Sometimes I’m not really sure what I believe, but I know that things often happen for a reason.

The other day, I wrote about going to see the Pursuit of Happyness. Damn good film, go see it. Those who haven’t seen it have probably at least seen the scene in the trailer where Chris Gardner, the main character played by Will Smith, meets a guy driving a sports car and sees hot the other side lives. He see that that things can be better and it motivates him to pursue a better way of life.

In a way, I lived that moment last night. It wasn’t as dramatic as the silver screen version, but I was there.

Read the rest of this entry »

I feel like crap and really just need to vent. If you don’t want to read my bitching and moaning, please skip this entry.

I think I’m depressed. Call it Seasonal Affective Disorder, call it plain sad… I’m depressed. Actually, it comes and goes. One minute, I’ll be fine and the next minute, I’m not. I feel like shit.

I think it’s this city. I really only have 3 friends in this town, so I end up spending a ton of time just sitting in my apartment alone… and what a shitty apartment it is! This place is too small for my stuff. It’s always cold and there’s a fucking rodent living in my ceiling. I’m not sure if it’s a rat or a squirrel, but it’s there and I hate it.

But then, maybe it’s not the town. Maybe it’s me. I’ve not been happy since I moved back to Augusta. There’s never enough money to cover my expenses, which is the reason I live in this shit hole of an apartment. It’s also the reason why sitting at home is how I spend my weekends, instead of getting out like everyone else my age.

I can’t continue to live like this… major changes need to happen in my life.